IT’S ALWAYS TWILIGHT IN MY WORLD

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In the spring of 2009 I was in the throes of a deep depression.  I had made a horrible financial error and was facing possible bankruptcy.  Ashamed and disgusted with myself, I didn’t even want to leave my house except to go to work.  And, even that was a struggle.  I just wanted to give up on everything.

In June of that awful year, my friend and co-worker, Cathi, came into my office with a book.  She said, “You have to read this.”  It was Twilight by Stephenie Meyer.

I made a face and replied, “Isn’t that for kids?” I vaguely remembered hearing something about this book, but I really didn’t know anything other than it was for teens.

“It’s about vampires and romance, and those are two of your favorite things.”  Well, she was right about that.

I agreed to take the book; although I was sure I would never read it.  But, we were going camping that weekend and reading was my second favorite thing to do when camping besides riding my ATV.  Twilight was lying on my dining room table as I was packing for the camping trip, so I tossed it into the bag with another book I was reading, just in case I finished the other book and got desperate.

Saturday morning, June 9th, awake before everyone else in camp and sitting by the campfire I had just built, I got curious about that book .  Vampires and romance?  Umm?  I thought I’d just read a couple of chapters to satisfy my curiosity.  By the end of Sunday night, I was finished with the entire book.  Within a week I had read all four books in the Twilight Saga and rented the Twilight movie.  Yes, Twilight had won me over and from that time on I would be proud to be called a Twihard, although many friends and family (and even people who don’t know me) would think I had lost my mind and harshly critique everything I did that involved Twilight from then on.

Why did a series of young adult books about a tortured teenage vampire and his clumsy girlfriend affect me so deeply, you ask?  Stephenie Meyer wasn’t the best writer I had ever read, and there were parts in the books that made me shake my head in wonder.  But, wow, she did know how to write about intense emotions.  These books touched something that had been hidden deep in my heart for so long I had forgotten what it felt like…falling in love for the first time.  Remember those passionate feelings of loving someone so much it physically hurts; they were so strong you were sure you would die if you ever lost that love?  Through all the heartbreak I had suffered romantically in my life, I had locked those tender feelings of hope, excitement and joy so far away that I forgot they had ever existed.  But now, reading this first book in the series, I remembered them all.  I was transported back to the magical time before two divorces and broken romances, back to the idealist young girl I had been at sixteen when I still believed in true love and destiny and being together for eternity.  Twilight and the following three books in the saga brought romance, hope and a sense of adventure back into my life, even if it was only in a literary way.  But, that was only the beginning.

I needed to know if there were other women my age who had found such a deep meaning from these novels.  My friend, Cathi, who had first given me the Twilight book, loved the series, but she did not feel the deep connection with it that I did, so I was worried I was being totally irrational about my love for this saga.  I began to search the Internet for others like me, and guess what?  I found them, thousands of them.

I joined an Older Woman’s Group on the Twilight Saga website and began to connect with other women—not teenagers—who had found some deep meaning in the Stephenie Meyer novels.  They understood why I loved it so much, because they had all felt similar emotions when they had read the four books in the series.  Some said it made their marriages stronger or inspired them to lose weight or pursue some lifelong goal.  Our love of Twilight brought us together on so many levels.  We began to talk on the phone, Skype, find ways to meet one another in person, and lifelong friendships began to develop between us.  These friendships have reached far beyond our love of the Twilight Saga.  We share our entire lives with one another, and even those of us who have not met personally know one another better than many friends we have had for years and years.  My Twi-sisters, as we call one another, are always the first (and sometimes only) ones to respond to my posts on Facebook or Twitter.  They are the most compassionate and caring group of women I’ve ever met.

In spite of personal hardships I had encountered in my life, my depression faded. I bared my soul to these new friends and they never judged me, unlike some family and old friends did when they heard about my financial situation.  In time, my money woes eased, and I was able to attend Twilight events where I met more of these amazing women.  Some of them are my best friends now, and it’s like we’ve known one another forever.

Since discovering Twilight, I have gone places I had never even imagined going before; I’ve met the most wonderful people I never would have met if it had not been for Twilight.  My writing career has received huge support from the Twilight community and I’ve reached new fans who had never even read an Historical Romance novel before they met me at a Twilight event or online through some Twilight Facebook page or website.

The world created by Stephenie Meyer changed my life.   I’ve read the books over and over and watched the movies too many times to count, and each time I can identify with the feelings of love, loss, desire, life and death, because I’ve lived them all.  But in the Twilight world I know that eternity exists, and it’s a total diversion from real life.  When I’m on the Facebook page I created to share my love of Twilight I have so much fun escaping into my fantasy world that for the time I’m there I’m not worrying about my elderly parent’s health, all my never-ending family drama, my job issues, my money problems or all the other stressful concerns in my life.

I have given up trying to explain it to the critics, because they will never comprehend it all.  But recently my oldest grandson asked me why I was so obsessed with Twilight and this is what I told him, “It’s not just an obsession, it’s been the ride of a lifetime and I wouldn’t trade the friends I’ve made and the adventures I’ve had in the past four years for anything in the world.”

He nodded and smiled, “Okay, Grandma, I think I understand now.”

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36 thoughts on “IT’S ALWAYS TWILIGHT IN MY WORLD

  1. I loved reading about how you came into the love of
    twilight books.
    I am thankful for them too as I have made some amazing
    Friends like Sisters…
    My Mom watched New Moon and loved it but sadly she
    Passed Dec before she could read any books.
    I have also made some very good friends in the Real
    Quileute Tribe at LaPush!!!
    I am meeting Stephanie Meyers Fri and will share with her what she has started grew into a life long friendship with my
    New Sisters …
    God Bless
    Teresa P

    1. I’m so sorry to hear about your mom, Teresa. My 88 yr. old mom thinks Edward is cute, LOL. I have made so many friends in Forks during the three times I’ve been there and I cherish them all. I’m so excited that you will be meeting Stephenie! WOW! Enjoy every second! ❤

  2. I accidentely fell in love with Twilight too… A copy of the movie mysteriously turned up in my house… I finally watched it and the rest is history… I , like you, have made so many wonderful friends because of this story and I know they will last forever… I travel with my Twi-sisters and we talk on the phone and I know I can always count on them for support and understanding and for the kick in the pants that I might need from time to time. I love my Sisters and so look forward to each new trip.. We never know who will show up.. But one thing is for sure.. We are not strangers… Just great friends who we haven’t met yet.

    1. Who would have thought a vampire story meant for teens could have had such a huge impact on so many lives, and most of them older women? Thank you for reading and responding to my story, Connie! Someday, maybe we will get to meet in Twilight land.

  3. This was a truly accidental love affair that led to some great friendships that I too hope last forever. Twilight has given my life meaning and structure, something I needed but didnt know that I needed. It has opened doors for me and given me so much happiness. It will live on forever within me and a large part of that is because of this lady here, whose page was one of the first that I stumbled across after I read the books. I found likeminded friends that didnt make fun of me and I found a home within V Style 🙂

  4. V ~ I was late to the whole Twilight thing too…my late mother-in-law passed away from Cancer, Sept 08.. turned right around and learned my dad had Cancer Nov 08…needless to say I walked around in the fog…Jan 09 I picked up a copy of Twilight along with another Vampire love story. It sat on my night stand for almost a month. I started seeing Twilight coming out soon on dvd…told my daughter I need to read the book…I was half way through it when she came home with the neighbor’s bootleg copy…and told me I just had to watch! Well the rest is history as they say…It has been my escape, from having to deal with the loss of 2 wonderful people, my late MIL, and then my dad lost his battle Sept 2011, in return I’ve shared this crazy Twilight LOVE with my daughter, made NEW friends/Sisters from all over the world thanx to the Twilight sage site, and other groups since then.. taught myself how to make fan~art because I wanted to show my love for Edward & Bella and to be able to share it with those who understood and love it just as much as me.
    Thank you for sharing this….well say V. (:

    1. I am so sorry to hear about your losses, Dawn. It sounds like Twilight came into your life in a good time. I would love to see your fan art. Is there a place I can find it, or if you would like to share it on Twilight V Style that would be awesome! Thank you for taking the time to read my story and for sharing the Twi-love with me. ❤

  5. Thanx V ~ it really did come at a good time. And of course you can 🙂 I’ll tag you on Facebook. And thank you for sharing your story… that’s what makes it even better, we all can relate. 🙂

  6. Veronica, who can explain our love of Twilight?? Is it because we can relate to Bella?? Is it the good girl/bad boy syndrome?? It dosent matter what it is, it came at a time when we were looking for something..support, friends, someone who would understand..I have met so many awesome
    women through the OWG..the word friend just does not touch the word SISTERHOOD…I am sorry that someone left negative comments about your post, but you know for every one person with a negative comment there
    are probably several hundred with a good comment, thats the ones who
    support you no matter what…thats the ones you write for…they get you.
    I have all your books even a autographed one (Thank You) and since the
    OWG so many women have been inspired to start writting, singing, sharing..because of the support that is offered. Its a good feeling to know if I am having a problem (who dosent) I can go to the internet, skype or even pick up the phone and there is a Sister waiting to listen and share…without
    judgement…those are the Sisters who walk beside you, through the good and the bad..who know that someone is there for them at all times…there have been women who have gone through divorces, money problems, alcoholism, kids on drugs etc that know they can come to the OWG or reach out to a special Sister for understanding, its not been without problems, I have lost good friends because I didnt do what they thought I should on the OWG, but I did what I thought was right and fair..I have lost good friends because they dont understand why I live like I do, but they dont walk in my
    shoes..it hurts to lose friends but I have so many more that do understand and dont judge, thats the ones I want to walk beside….Thanks for letting me ramble..thanks for being my friend…and always know I am here no matter what…Thats what a Sister is for…Proud of you! God Bless

    1. Thank you, Donna. You never ramble and I love hearing from you. Of course, you know your special part in my story since you created the OWG, but getting to know you personally has been so much more special. I still remember vividly the day we talked on the phone. I couldn’t believe I was actually talking to THE DONNA! Your wonderful group was the beginning of all the Twilight friendships and adventures that would come my way. I am looking forward to all the adventures we have in store for us in the coming years. Never lose touch please. ❤

  7. Besides the wonderful serrogate sisters that I’ve made, Twilight got me started on the road to reading! Although I’m on to more adult material I still cherish the series and the friends that I’ve made along the way. I’ve had discussions with complete strangers about the series (in airports, in the bead merchant, in work related meetings, etc). It was life-altering! LaPush is still on my bucket list… 🙂

    1. You’ll get to La Push, Patti! Thank you for reading my story and for all the fun and awesome manips you’ve done for me. I cherish them all, and I especially cherish our friendship. I have Twilight to thank for that. ❤

  8. Veronica, like you, my life was forever changed after a few short chapters of a “Young Adult” themed book. I am forever thankful and extremely blessed to have some extraordinary women in my life now because of it. Emotions were reawakened in me that had been dormant for a while. Reading your story, getting to know you and watch your success makes me so very happy!
    Sisters Rule!
    xoxo
    Debra

    1. Thank you so much, Debra. Our support for one another cannot be equaled, and I am constantly amazed at how close we all are when we have never even met one another. It is a very special and unique sisterhood and I’m so happy to be a part of it!

  9. V, Thank you for saying all that I feel about Twilight. I’m so glad we were brought together thru the Saga…and have made lasting friendships! I love you and support you!

  10. Great post V! You forgot to mention your insane Twi-hard friend who has all the Barbies. LOL 😉 I just found out my Alice is going for $225. Give me a call this week. HUGS

    1. I could never forget you, Krista. Since we are both insane, we have even more in common. LOL! Wow, that is awesome about your Alice doll. That is a very valuable collection you have there. I won’t promise I’ll call, because I have a lot to do before my Twilight party on Saturday. Thanks for reading the story! xoxoxoxox

  11. Really enjoyed your story!! I too came late to the Twilight party! I have never been interested in vampires at all. My friend was reading the books and talked me into going to see Twilight when it came out. I liked it ok. I went to see New Moon and Eclipse. THEN I finally read the books and I was hooked HARD. None of my friends or my kids understand my obsession but they are kind to me at least….LOL…I would love to read more of your thoughts…please email me with a link to your fan page or Facebook page.

  12. Your story sounds just like mine !! I was also at a low point in my life and my daughter convinced me to watch the movie. I liked the movie very much and she told me the book was better. Needless to say I read the 4 books in 4 days !! It has changed my life dramatically. My marriage is stronger than ever, I lost 40 lbs and my outlook on life has changed. I have made some of the most wonderful friends too. Thank you for sharing your story and reaffirming for us Twi-hards that we are not alone or insane :)…

    1. Thank you so much for sharing your story, too, Terri! I’m always amazed at how profoundly Twilight affected so many lives. I think for ones like us, Twilight truly will be forever. xoxo

  13. Me too! I had never heard of Twilight until my co-worker told me about it. The movie had just come out on DVD and I added it to my Netflix. It changed my life! I bought all 4 books read through them like a crazed person and bought the soundtrack. I had no idea how much this story would become a part of my everyday life. My co-worker and I even drove from California to Forks in 2011 for the Stephenie Meyer weekend. It was the trip of a lifetime. How often can you visit something real like that? The only cd’s in my car are from the movies, I’ve watched the movies 1,000’s of times and read the series at least 6 times. I have a shrine to Twilight in my living room. I am 47 years old and proud to be a Twihard! Forever!!

    1. Hi Gillie! Thank you for reading my story and sharing yours with me. I’ve been to Forks three times, and a part of my heart remains there always. I’ve also visited the movie sites, and omg, there is nothing to compare with seeing where Rob was actually at! LOL! My shine to Twilight takes up half of my basement. I can stand in front of it for hours, smiling and remembering where I got (or who sent me) every little memento. So very special. I’m older than you and I too, will be a proud Twihard forever! xoxoxo

  14. You’ve said exactly what I’ve been trying to say to people for almost 5 years now. I actually started by watching Twilight then read the books in 3 days. And if it was not for the Twilight series or my Twilight family I would not be where I am today. When I met Stephanie Myers all I could do was thank her and tell her how much I appreciated her and the world she made.

    1. You are so lucky to have met Stephenie! I missed meeting her last year at SMD in Forks and it was the first time I hadn’t been to SMD in three years. So bummed! Thank you for taking the time to read my story. It is so special to share it with others who understand and love Twilight the way I do. xoxoxo

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